A bespoke Dinosaur Comic about... YOU??

Hi, it's me Ryan North, and I've been writing Dinosaur Comics for over twenty years!  I've done other things in that time too but that's the big one.  Anyway for the first time EVER, I'm offering a BESPOKE Dinosaur Comic for you or your loved one!  You'll just tell me all about you/them and in a few days I'll email you a comic - both normal and print-resolution - that has T-Rex, Utahraptor, and Dromiceiomimus gushing about how great they are.  Or how awful, if you want to go that way. This could be a really good way to get some professionally-crafted sick burns, but probably you'll just want to be nice.